First Rule? Coffee First!

Don’t, I mean absolutely DON’T open a letter from your insurance company before you’ve had a cup of coffee. I think I’ve read that stupid thing twelve times and I still don’t understand what the heck they are saying. How one typed page neatly folded into a neat white envelope can cause so much confusion first thing in the morning is beyond me. As far as I can understand, it is in regards to Brett’s  wisdom tooth extraction 7 months ago. They want his first born child, xrays of his brain and photos of him and they want to me to enclose $76 (or they will happily debit my account). WHAT?

First of all, our dental insurance (much like our health insurance) is really only good for catastrophic care. Let’s say, for instance, I’m playing baseball (which I will never do) and I am trying to catch the ball and miss (which would probably happen, which is why I will never play baseball) and it hits my mouth and all of my teeth get knocked out. I THINK it might be helpful to have my dental insurance then. Maybe. I pay $165 to have cleanings and xrays PARTIALLY covered, for GAWDS sake. When Brett needed his wisdom teeth out, I thought that I’d finally get some good use out of my insurance company, but we still ended up paying $800 out of pocket, and it was only that cheap because he elected NOT to get knocked out. Well, I might have bribed him called him a wuss. Just kidding. I’m an awesome mom, but not THAT awesome. I does suck to sit there crossing your fingers, hoping for your bank account’s sake, that your kid will pick the cheaper option (by about $500).

Seriously, I have a teeth issue. Like, I think people should have teeth. If they lose one, they should get a replacement. At least if it’s in the front where everyone can see it’s missing. I get it’s expensive, but so is a car. Sell your car and get a tooth. Really. It’s that important. But the cost of maintaining your teeth, just like the cost of all medical care in this country is not sustainable.

Think what you want about The modaAffordable Care Act (AKA Obamacare), but at least someone is trying to do something to make it possible for people to receive medical care without having to starve their kids. It’s not perfect and there is still a lot of room for improvement, I know, but enough is enough is enough, and WE are a healthy family! I have a client from Poland and once a year, she gets her WHOLE family on a PLANE and flies back to Poland where they stay for three weeks to a month and get ALL of their medical appointments taken care of. Yes, it is actually cheaper to buy airfare, stay for a month AND get their medical needs taken care of, than it is to stay in their own house here and go to the doctors/dentists here. What is wrong with that picture?

As for my insurance company, I think maybe I’ll send them a picture of my dog’s dental xrays, one of Skyler’s old Barbie dolls and Brett’s extracted wisdom teeth. That should be good enough right? As for the $76… well, they’ll have to get in line behind my kids, my house payment and my grocery bill.

I think I just might cancel my insurance and take a trip to Poland every year. Vacation, clean teeth and sauerkraut soup. Sounds like a winning combination!


2 thoughts on “First Rule? Coffee First!

  1. Pingback: Look Mom… | 86,400 Seconds

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